Things NOT to Do at the Company Holiday Party

It’s bad enough to wake up on a Sunday morning with a headache and some cringe-inducing memories of last night’s newly invented dance moves. But it’s ten times as bad when the dance moves were premiered in front of your boss on the one night each year that employees are encouraged to wear their fanciest attire and showcase their best off-duty personas.

Don’t wake up this way after your office holiday party. Instead, bask in the glow of a clean conscience and enjoy the memory of yourself NOT touching any inappropriate thing or person, not shouting any remarks across any rooms, no matter how funny or true, and not getting ready to join the ranks of the unemployed for the worst possible reasons. Here are a few helpful tips.

First, this is not a party. Be positive and spread good cheer, but don’t be misled. You are being watched. Everyone is, including (especially) your managers and bosses. Everyone is laughing and smiling, but not with genuine hilarity. They are all making sacrifices for the benefit of the moment and the scene. These are manners, and this is business. Smile, but don’t enjoy yourself too much. You’re going to live for many, many years, ideally– You can afford to sacrifice a few hours of potential fun.

Second, it’s a party! Enjoy yourself! While you’re keeping your voice pleasant, counting your drinks, and editing every remark before it comes out of your mouth, relax. Live a little.

Don’t slouch, tug at your clothes, or be caught standing in the corner alone. Seriously. The holiday party can attach some lasting impressions to your personal brand. Watch your posture and keep moving.

Feel free to dance, but do it like this: Keep your feet mostly stationary and focus on your shoulders and arms. Let your shoulders do the work. Try a little up and down, then maybe some back-and-forth. Keep your arms relaxed and extended with elbows gently bent. Keep the groove high. Let your hips join the fun, but not too much, and only after 10:00 pm.

Don’t touch your face. If you feel nervous, shred a napkin. Make witty remarks, but don’t tell jokes.

Check your teeth often, but do it discretely. Keep your tie tied and your shirt tucked in. Drink lots of water. Don’t take off your shoes.